Every parent wants to see their son or daughter grow into their own, adult self. How they learn and how they grow is important. The way they choose to deal with the consequences of their choices is also important.
The first thing you want to do when your child makes a mistake is to teach them to find a way to own it.
Make sure they know how to admit errors, and then help them find a way to own them. Your child needs to feel safe to own their own mistake. Teach them how to say, “I’m sorry.” Help them find a way to own it. Teach them how to act out of love.
If your child can’t find a way to own the mistake and they become destructive, you will need to step in. The reason for this is because you’re the parent. Your job is to teach your child how to do things. Your child needs to know how to apologize, how to say, “I’m sorry,” how to be assertive. They need to know how to take ownership of their actions. You will need to step in. You will need to help them find a way to own the destructive behavior. You will need to teach them how to act out of love.
If your child learns the way to act out of control, you will need to step in. Your child needs to know how to take ownership of their own actions and how to act in a way that brings the peace of God. Teach them how to give and take responsibility. They need to know how to be an effective teacher.
Whether they apologize, how they learn and how they grow, you will need to step in. The first thing you need to do is have a chat with your son or daughter about how they feel about life. Find out where their anger comes from and how they learned to express it. You will need to help them figure out a way to own their mistake. The other thing you will need to do is step in. You will need to help them find a way to own the destructive behavior and teach them how to act out of love.
These two things will need to happen before you can be sure that you’re getting the help you need.